A the end of Kellyn's 2nd ballet and tap class the instructor and the director took me aside and told me how good Kellyn was. They suggested that she take a more advanced class on Saturdays that has 1st graders in it. It would be an hour and a half long and includes jazz in addition to ballet and tap. I asked what exactly they thought she was good at and they said she picks up on things quickly and can physically do the moves easily. They also said she had good listening and comprehending skills. I told them that her swim teacher also said she was a very good swimmer and wanted her to move up to an advanced class as well. So, I was curious if they thought the 2 might be related. Her instructor said she was on the swim team and thinks it made her a better dancer and vise versa. Very Interesting! I asked if they wanted her to move classes because she is just an older 4 and will be 5 in about 6 weeks. They said No, that there have been 5 year olds in this class before. So, I decided not to move her out of this class for a few reasons. I'm not willing to sacrifice that much family time on the weekends or evenings, I think that dancing for an hour and a half would just suck the fun right out of it for such a young child and I know that she really loves being in a class with her friends and would be intimidated by a bunch of older school age girls who have probably been doing this for a number of years. Not to mention the fact that she might not really be as good as they think. It might just be that she just finished 4 classes at DCJ a few weeks ago and it is still fresh on her mind. I told them we would revisit this idea in December after she is 5 and see if they still really think she should move up. I figure if she is really good at something right now then she will still be good at it in a year from now.
You should have seen the look of shock on their faces when I turned their offer down. I know it is culturally acceptable and socially expected to push your kids to excel in everything and to have them enrolled in many, many activities, to fill all of their free time with organized sports or the like, but I don't believe that is the right choice for my family. I want to raise a kid who has character, not one who is a character. You have to know their heart, what makes them unique. In order to do this, you have to spend time with them, not relegate it out to dance instructors, coaches, or camp counselors. They just want to spend time with their parents and feel loved and respected by their parents for being who they are. I want to use this time to lay a firm foundation for a lifetime relationship with my children. When they get older and move away, they’ll want to come back and visit! No one can take your place instilling your child’s positive self-image, view of the world, concept of faith, and sense of security. Only you, the Mommy or Daddy, can do that. I highly recommend the book, It's Your Kid not a gerbil: Creating a Happier & Less Stressed Home by Dr. Kevin Leman for his 10 Ways to Rear a Kid From the Inside Out.
On a side note, you should see the looks I get when I tell people that Kellyn is going to preschool only 2 days a week. "Aren't you worried she won't be ready for Kindergarten next year?" No, I'm worried I won't have enough time with her before she is in school everyday. The early childhood years are such a short amount of time in which their brain absorbs so much. I want to be sure that I pour as much as I can into her sponge while I can. I want her home so I can be the one to teach her social skills, how to play independently and all about the love of Jesus in addition to so much more. I've been given this very small window of opportunity to invest so much and I want to use my time wisely. But I have to tell you, Mommy peer pressure is real! I am going against the grain just by not having my almost 5 year old in preschool 3 to 4 days a week and by not having her enrolled in 2 or more activities and by having our weekends free of meets, scrimmages, or games. God has really put me to the test recently to see if I'm going to stick to my guns or cave into peer pressure. When Kellyn is not in the same class with her friends then I am not in the same group of moms as my friends. It's a little sad and in the back of my mind I think, "Maybe the majority is right and I should put he in more days a week", but then I snap out of it and remember what I have read about the brain. Bain development research says that all children level off by 3rd grade whether they went to preschool or not. This was based on children raised in middle class homes who have parents that read to them and connect with them. Kids raised under a lower socio-economic status with 2 working parents (basically latch key kids) do better than their peers in the same situation when they attend preschool. But you can see the difference and why. I have read about how more synapses fire off in the brain when young children are engaging in free, unstructured play with their parents than in a structured classroom setting. Anyways, I digress. I've just had Parent Peer Pressure hit me harder than usual this week, sorry. It is just my opinion and I don't mean to place it on you. Only you can make the best decision for your family and don't let me or anyone else judge you for whatever it may be.
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